Practice in the infertility field has given us lot of practical knowledge regarding patients insights and aspirations. But I am still surprised at the attitude of some of the patients, while choosing an egg or sperm donor.
I would like to believe that, for a couple who have not had children for long time, a healthy baby must be the main objective. But the society, especially in India gives so much emphasis to the colour, looks and the caste. Few of the parents are not worried about the donor’s nature, education, health, background or profession, but concerned with the color, appearance and religion.
Although we do not reveal the identity of the donors, we give the physical details and background of the donors. But many a times the demands of the intended parents are difficult for me to comprehend. These dark moments are distressing for me compared to my otherwise contented and fulfilling profession. I am not generalising, I do meet parents, who doesn't care about the trivial factors and whose only concern is a healthy baby.
As a doctor, I want to help the infertile couple, want to see their beaming faces while holding their baby. But it hurts and pains a lot, when I think that we live in a society, where colour and appearance is the only judging criteria for most of us. Changes are visible in some sections of the society, but I sincerely hope that this will spread to all parts of our society.